La Sacoche A DRV

A living bag joins your world at the same time you do, shows up in the tab list, and follows you everywhere. Never hit it.

"Sacoche" is French for satchel — a big leather shoulder bag. This mod puts one in Minecraft, gives it teeth, and makes it decide that you belong to it.

La Sacoche à DRV is a horror-comedy mod built on one joke taken completely seriously: what if a bag followed you for your entire playthrough, showed up in the player list like a real person, chatted like one, stole from your inventory, and killed you the instant you raised a hand against it?

There is no ore to mine, no recipe to grind, no config file to read. You install it, you load your world, and something is already waiting.

The first thirty seconds

Three things happen before you take a single step, and none of them are things a vanilla mob can do.

A player joins your world. Chat announces La_Sacoche_a_DRV joined the game. Press TAB and the name is sitting there in the player list, Survival mode, 666 ms ping, exactly where a real person would be. You are in singleplayer. Nobody connected.

Three seconds later it appears beside you. A 1.4-block leather satchel with a buckled strap, hovering just off the ground and swaying gently.

It never leaves again. It is bound to your player UUID, so this is not a mob that wanders off or loses interest. Log out and back in — it is there. Walk 500 blocks — it teleports to you. Go to the Nether — it follows. Die and respawn — it is standing at your spawn point. It cannot despawn, it is immune to fire, and it has 200 HP.

For the first few minutes it behaves itself. That is deliberate.

What it does while it follows you

It talks in chat, and you cannot tell it from a person

The satchel's messages use chat.type.text, the exact same format the game uses for real player messages. No mod prefix, no coloured tag, no italics, nothing to give it away. On a server, a player who does not know the mod is installed will read a line from La_Sacoche_a_DRV and answer it.

It has ten ambient lines on rotation, plus specific reactions for when you open it, when it robs you, and when the paper finds its way back to you.

It steals from you

About every 45 seconds, if you are within 6 blocks, it takes one random stack out of your hotbar and puts it inside itself. You find out because a slot is suddenly empty — and because it mentions it in chat.

Nothing is lost. Right-click the satchel and your stack is sitting in its inventory, and it will not take anything else until you have taken that one back. It is a running annoyance rather than a grief tool, but it will happen while you are mining, while you are fighting a creeper, and at the worst possible moment.

You can open it, and there is something inside

Right-click and a 27-slot container opens, exactly like a chest. In the middle slot sits DRV's Paper, an epic-rarity item with one line written on it, in French:

dans la sacoche à DRV y'a ta mère

("what's in DRV's satchel? your mum.")

You can take it. This is the point where the mod stops being polite.

The paper cannot be got rid of

Drop it and it flies back into your inventory three seconds later. Die and it is waiting for you at respawn — it is stripped out of your death drops before they even spawn. Throw it in lava and nothing happens, the item is fire-resistant. Lock it in a chest and it stays there, but the satchel quietly restocks a fresh one the next time you open it.

It is a permanently occupied inventory slot, and it is a joke about your mother.

Hit it once. That is all it takes.

Left-click the satchel in Survival and the mod changes character completely.

Instantly, before you can react. Blindness, Darkness, Nausea and Slowness III land at the same moment. Your screen goes black, your vision warps, and you can barely walk.

A sound starts looping, and it follows the satchel. The audio is mono, which means Minecraft applies full 3D positioning to it — it starts quiet and behind you, and it grows louder as the satchel closes the distance. You are blind. That sound is the only information you have about where it is.

It changes shape. The flap snaps open onto two rows of teeth, two red eyes light up on the front, and the leather pulses red. This is a real model state with animated geometry, not a texture swap.

It stops following and starts running. It moves faster than you can sprint. Get more than 20 blocks away and it does not give up — it teleports to you and keeps coming.

Then it catches you. The chase ends when it gets within 2.6 blocks, with a hard 20-second ceiling if you somehow survive that long. You die, with a custom death message naming the satchel.

You cannot fight back. It refuses every source of damage — sword, bow, TNT, lava, fall damage, the void. Attacking it only starts the chase again. The single exception is /kill, left working on purpose so that server admins and players who have had enough are never actually stuck with it.

In Creative mode it does not react at all, so you can build with it floating beside you.

Type five words and something far worse arrives

Send this in chat, in any capitalisation:

DRV INVOQUE TOI

The message never reaches the other players. It is intercepted and replaced with <yourname> A INVOQUÉ DRV. Two seconds of silence follow. Then:

Lightning strikes 16 blocks in front of you. The Wither spawn sound and a Warden roar fire at once. Every player within 40 blocks is hit with Nausea and Darkness.

A man almost 11 blocks tall is standing in the strike. Six times the size of a normal player, 500 HP, with an enormous satchel strapped to his left arm. He looks at you, and then he runs.

He is faster than you are. The ground shakes with every step. The sound loop plays for as long as he exists. If he never catches you, he gives up and vanishes after three minutes.

He does not punch you. He bags you.

His attack is not an ordinary melee hit. When he connects:

• SACOCHÉ fills your screen as a title
• you are launched into the air with real velocity, not knockback
• you are given Slow Falling for 20 seconds so the flight actually lasts
• when you finally land, the mod tells you exactly how many blocks you travelled

The damage is set to 12 on purpose — low enough that a player in iron armour survives it. Killing you outright would end the joke before the punchline. Being hit by him is the best part of the mod, and you are meant to live through it and see where you land.

At range, he throws the bag at you

Sprinting away does not save you. Past 10 blocks, if he has line of sight, he throws his satchel. It tumbles end over end through the air with its own spin animation and detonates on impact, filling a 4-block radius with Nausea and Levitation — including any friends standing next to you.

Then the bag is back on his arm and he is still running.

/drvinvoque does the same thing, for servers where a plugin filters or eats chat messages.

Why this is worth downloading

It is the only mod where the mob is a player. The tab list entry is a genuine ClientboundPlayerInfoUpdatePacket built byte by byte and sent to your client. The chat lines use the vanilla player-chat format. On a multiplayer server, someone who does not know better cannot tell that La_Sacoche_a_DRV is not a human being — right up until it starts running at one.

It is a prank that still works on people who know it is coming. Put it on a shared server and say nothing. The satchel introduces itself. The first person who hits it finds out why you do not hit it, in front of everybody.

It is permanent, not summoned. Most horror mobs are things you go looking for. This one is attached to your account for the entire save, from your first sunrise to your thousandth night, and it has all the time in the world.

It leaves your world alone. No blocks, no ores, no world generation, no recipes, no altered vanilla behaviour, no config to tune. Your base, your farms and your other mods are untouched. It is one entity, one item and one summon, and they mind their own business.

What gets added

Entities

Entity	Health	What it does
Sacoche	200	Bound to your UUID, follows you across dimensions, never despawns, invulnerable except to /kill
Géant DRV	500	About 11 blocks tall. Summoned by chat or command, despawns after 3 minutes
Thrown satchel	—	The giant's ranged attack. Nausea and Levitation in a 4-block radius

Items

Item	What it does
DRV's Paper	Epic rarity, fire-resistant, returns when dropped, survives your death
Satchel spawn egg	Creative only
Giant DRV spawn egg	Creative only

All three sit in their own Creative tab.

Commands

Command	What it does
/drvinvoque	Summons the giant. Identical to the chat phrase

Requirements and compatibility

• Minecraft 1.20.1
• Minecraft Forge 47.x
• Works in singleplayer, over LAN, and on dedicated servers
• On a server, install the jar on both the server and every client — the mod adds entities and models, so both sides need it
• English and French translations included
• No config file, no dependencies, and no mixins into vanilla classes, so it should sit alongside other content mods without conflict

Removing it

Delete the jar. The satchel and the paper go with it and your world is otherwise untouched.

To get rid of the satchel without uninstalling the mod, /kill @e[type=drvsacoche:sacoche] works and always will.

It comes back the next time you join. That is the whole idea.